Bacteria in Mustaches & Beards

I wanted to bring this to the attention of anyone who has facial hair or someone who has a spouse or partner with facial hair because most do not realize just how much bacteria is being spread to their loved ones or as a bacterial growth medium for their own health issues and spreading it to their children, partners and family members. Everyone needs to think about this.

Did you ever notice how men tend to constantly stroke their beards and mustaches? Each time they do this they are spreading bacteria and anything else they have touched onto their facial hair. This also applies to any facial hair including the one or two day growth. The beards, mustaches goatees and any other styles of facial hair are also a catch-all for food, beverages, saliva, nasal discharge (a nice way of saying snot), dead skin cells, etc. and sexual activity. Even if you washed your hands, did you wash the hair on your face which you have been stroking all day?

When you went to the restroom, did you wash your hands? Did you handle yourself when taking a pee? It would be difficult to tuck yourself away after doing so if you didn’t. Did you flush the toilet with your hand? Did you lift the seat with your hand? Did you wash your hands with soap? My point being to highlight the many sources of bacteria. If you handle yourself when going to the restroom or scratch yourself or eat and drink beverages and anything you touch is being transferred to your facial hair every time you stroke your beard, etc.  Then there is smoking which transfers to facial hair as well.

Do you have pets? Pets lick themselves then you pet them and that bacteria transfers to your hands which transfers to your facial hair you keep stroking.

Do you kiss your children, wife, girlfriend, partner? All that bacteria in your facial hair has transferred to them and any bacteria they have such as children wiping their nose on their clothes or baby or all the things they handled without washing are being exchanged with your facial hair.

This bacteria in the facial hair can cause acne and cold sores and seborrhea and all manner of gross things. They are scratchy and the constant stroking coats the facial hair with skin oils, dead skin cells, pet saliva, your saliva, pet dander and all manner of bacteria I listed above.

I had a spouse who had a mustache and a bad case of seborrhea around that mustache. It was also a nest for psoriasis. Selsun Blue shampoo helped eliminate Seborrhea and Psoriasis to some degree by leaving it on affected areas for about 15 minutes, then washing it off. But the thing that worked the best was his shaving the mustache off. All the seborrhea and irritated skin cleared up as soon as he got rid of the bacteria holding mustache.

If you are going to have facial hair, then you need to frequently wash your hands and your face and facial hair with appropriate soap or facial and hand cleanser to eliminate bacteria. Facial hair is also a carrier for cold germs, flu virus, and a plethora of other bacteria and viruses  which someone may have coughed upon you which you carried home to your family. Think about the welfare of your family. Is their health worth wearing a beard or facial hair? I know that the males in the movie business tend to wear beards to ward off any unwanted attentions from coworkers but they can just say no instead. Besides, facial hair makes them look 15 to 20 years older than they are.

Just a few tips and tidbits I thought men should know about the hazards of facial hair.

I am not a doctor, nor am I in the medical business. I’m an engineer and research scientist. Please see a qualified doctor or medical practitioner or hospital as needed for medical advice or treatment. I can only share my observations on these issues.




Thin fingernails

This is an easy one to fix. My fingernails have always been so thin they bend and break and tear. When I started taking 3000 mg of Biotin every day, my nails became amazingly thick and sturdy. It also has the amazing effect of causing your hair to grow in thick and fill in thinning hair with new growth. (See my other article on hair loss) The hair comes in healthy and thick. This has worked for everyone I know, whom I recommended it to; keeping in mind that hair only grows a half inch each month. When I stopped using it for a while, my nails became thin again. So it definitely works.

My mother used to insist on taking gelatin and keratin and brewers yeast but nothing ever worked for nails and hair like Biotin. It is also supposed to improve your skin as well. Give your new nails time to grow thick. It doesn’t occur overnight. 

However, I also must warn that the dosage directions are to take only one 1000mg tablet daily. My doctor is aware of the dosage I take. I figured my hair was so damaged at the time, I needed extra; which beautifully thickened both my nails and hair. My nails were at least 5 times as thick and completely unbendable and sturdy. Like acrylic nails. I’ve never had nails like this my entire life. It is amazing.

My thinning hair grew in thick and long and stronger than ever and even has ringlet curls. My hair has always been string straight, thin and extremely baby fine my entire life. It was like Amber Frey’s courtroom hair… not the greasy hair. Now it is thick with curls as if I had used a curling iron and strong as well. Quite long.

Biotin has an amazing effect on nails and hair and lists skin improvement as well. I didn’t have a problem with that, but it may help others.

I can only describe the experiences for myself, my family and friends. I am not a doctor. I am an engineer. Please see a doctor or hospital for medical advice or treatment.

Chronic Irritable Bladder

I will share something I learned on this subject. I discovered that the more fruit juices I drank, the more my bladder became irritated. This was a surprise since they recommend acidic juices to reduce bacteria in the bladder. I don’t know whether it was the acid or the sugars in fruit juices, but the more I drank, the more often I had to go. The more often I went, the more irritated my bladder became. Not just a 4oz glass. That was fine. But anything more than an 8oz glass of fruit juice or Gatorade was enough to cause frequent urination and increasing irritation. The worse the irritation, the more chance of bacteria becoming an additional factor and become a bladder infection.

However, if I drank nothing but skim milk (milk with no bovine hormones bGH which causes irritable bowel syndrome), I did not have any trouble with my bladder. All the irritation went away and I stopped having any bladder problems whatsoever. But as soon as I got tired of drinking skim milk and decided to drink more than 8oz of fruit juice, it started all over again. This was when I had no issues with blood sugar which can compound these bladder problems. High blood glucose levels cause the body to start dumping sugar into the bladder which causes frequent urination and bladder irritation.

I noticed that the low sugar watered down apple juice sold by Market Pantry, a Target brand, seemed to cause less bladder irritation than the full strength fruit juices. Keeping in mind that I never buy fruit juice with any corn syrup or additional sugars. So if you feel you need to drink some fruit juice, I recommend this reduced sugar brand but not in large amounts. You can add a packet of Truvia  to your glass of reduced sugar apple juice to make it sweeter. Truvia sweetener works best when it is used on something with natural sweetness like apple juice or apple sauce. It does not work well on a sugarless product like tea unless a small amount of sugar is added to it. Truvia tends to double sweeteness of a product which already has some low levels of natural or added sugars so Truvia (Stevia) can help you cut down the amount of sugar you use by amplifying the sweetness. But it is terrible when used as the sole source of sweetness.

However, back to bladder irritation, you can try this for yourself. Try drinking skim milk for a few days and stay away from fruits and fruit juices and away from bladder acidifiers and see if your bladder begins to calm down. Again, I’m not sure whether it is the acid or sugars or both which are causing the irritation… but these are also tied to increased frequency of urination which seems to set off the bladder irritation. I know it got so bad I was having to use pyridium (Uristat) to relieve the irritation. (That is the medicine which turns the urine bright orange).

I tried the cranberry acidifier and that was just as bad as drinking fruit juice in causing irritation. As an Engineer, I notice patterns which is how I discovered what was causing these problems. You first have to have the problem in order to recognize the patterns. Thus, unless the doctor has chronic bladder irritation, they would not be aware of these issues.

Fistulas can also be sources of repeated bacterial bladder infections. Bladder and urethra irritation could also be a reaction to soaps, detergents, lotions or other chemicals. Or even the water you bathe in. You can also get irritations from STD’s and transmitted viruses or bacterias. You may need to get swabs or blood tests to look for various chlamydias or other infections.

You can also get yeast infections inside the bladder despite what doctors may believe. Due to the amounts of antibiotics I’ve had to take, I’ve had yeast in the stomach and in the bladder which can only be alleviated by Diflucan. If your tongue is whitish then you probably have Thrush, a yeast infection in the mouth. These are easily eliminated. But  many doctors seem to think the yeast can’t thrive in stomach or bladder acid. Believe me… they can. Just because a doctor thinks otherwise does not make him right. They are often wrong but rarely admit to it.

Males also have bladder problems from prostate enlargement. This is not necessarily indicative of something bad to be afraid of but definitely needs to be checked by a doctor to get the appropriate medicines or treatments. It could simply be an infection or abscess. Don’t delay out of fear. The sooner you get a problem treated, the better chance you have of recovering. Delaying can end up in catastrophic results.

Males have less bladder issues from external irritants because the urethra is a lot longer than those of females. But not impossible. Bacteria and viruses can also infect their bladders as well.

The doctor can take a urine sample to check for bacteria and you can request to  have those bacteria tested for sensitivity responses to a variety of antibiotics in the lab petrie dishes. You don’t want to let a bladder infection go untreated. My great great great grandfather died of uremic poisoning due to a blocked bladder. Even though the doctors finally cleared the blockage, he had suffered toxic buildup (uremic poisoning) during the days he waited to get help and died just a couple days after they cleared the blockage. His kidneys were irreparably damaged.

A bladder infection is something not to ignore or delay. Especially if the urine is cloudy or dark or has an odor of any kind. I went into septic shock from allowing a bladder infection to go untreated. I was taking oral antibiotics at the time but they were not digesting well enough to get high enough levels into my blood. My kidneys were failing and I nearly died. If you have any vomiting or diarrhea, you can become dehydrated within 12 to 24 hours which can concentrate the bacteria to deadly levels overnight. My white count was 40(000) and I was within 4 hours of total kidney failure when I went to the hospital and was rushed to ICU. So a bladder infection is not something to ignore. I was lucky I did not delay another minute.

In some cases of recurring bladder infections, a daily long term antibiotic is one of the last resort treatments to stop the recurrence of infections, especially when a fistula may be involved or other type of chronic cross contamination of bacteria.

However, if you drink a lot of fruit juices and have frequent bladder irritation… try changing to a non-acidic, non-sugar drink such as skim milk (Horizon or other brand without bGH bovine hormones) for a few days and see if that reduces the irritation and reduces the frequency of urination. I would think coffee or tea would also be too acidic. So the only alternatives I can think of to try would be skim milk which works for me, or water. I would distill or boil the water since most US water contains cryptosporidium & other organisms. Avoid sugars, acids, sodium & caffeine’s. This should reduce frequency & irritation. It can’t hurt to try for a few days as long as you do not have an infection going untreated. It will not fix an infection. That requires antibiotics.

If we can stop the bladder from becoming irritated, we might be able to reduce the numbers of bladder infections we have. I believe the irritations caused by acidic & sweet fruit juices & sodium like gatorade are causing frequent urination leading to irritation which then progresses to infection. If we can stop the trigger of the process, we may be able to prevent recurring infections.

However, as always, this problem should be under the care of a doctor so it doesn’t become a serious or dangerous health situation. I am not a doctor so I can only offer my observations from personal experience. Please seek a doctor or hospital for medical advice or treatment.

Abusive or Violent relationships

I decided to separate these issues into separate posts to better categorize the issues.

I had a former neighbor who had an abusive spouse who was constantly putting her down and trying to break her self esteem.  She realized she had been cowering and allowing her cruel spouse to torment her and he was feeding off his cruelty and reducing her to tears. She didn’t have any money like my other friend had. My neighbor just had a nasty spouse who enjoyed tormenting her. A gun nut which made him even more dangerous. I actually saw him smiling one  time when he reduced her to tears.

She decided to stop the cycle of abuse. She described how she just started smiling pleasantly every time her spouse said something cruel. (She said it is important not to make a nasty or sarcastic smile, otherwise it doesn’t work and the spouse would know he was getting under your skin).  The smile has to look genuine and not overdone. She stopped arguing back. It takes two to argue. He used to say mean things just to get her upset, but she  just smiled pleasantly, said “OK” nicely and walked away. My neighbor made it a personal rule to never say something more than twice. If the other person did not get it after the second time, there was no point in repeating it further. Anything more than twice is a waste of breath. Thus, she never engaged in another argument. She simply stated her opinion no more than twice and walked away after that with a smile. You can’t force someone to agree with you no matter how wrong they may be. Even if they are saying it about you. They are only doing that to get you upset. Her spouse tried to push every button to get her upset again, but she just ignored him, smiled and walked away. Within just a couple weeks, my neighbor’s spouse came apart at the seams because he was no longer able to feed on tormenting her and making her life miserable. He stopped bathing, stopped doing his job and became a basket case simply because he could no longer reduce her to tears. With him coming apart at the seams, she was able to get away from him and moved to another state.

I found her method to be quite effective. I haven’t had to raise my voice nor argue in 20 years. I am not an expert by any means. I can only describe my own experiences or those of my family or friends. Hopefully, some of the info is helpful as an insight about the cruelty of some people and why you shouldn’t allow someone to destroy your self esteem. No one is worth that. Anyone who says nasty things is not your friend and does not care about your welfare.

However, if you live with a violent person, they can be deadly dangerous. You can’t reason with a psychotic and they tend to be unpredictable and can rapidly become murderous. You need to get away to a safe place and have someone help you if necessary.

I had another friend who wanted to leave a violently abusive spouse who was making threats if she ever left, so she called the police while he was otherwise occupied and told the officers she wanted to leave but her spouse had threated to harm her if she tried to leave. She said she was afraid of his violence and asked them to come out to insure her safety as she was leaving. She had not given her spouse any clue she was leaving until the officers had arrived. He was in the shower and was completely surprised to see the police. The police even gave her a ride to the bus station and made sure she was able to leave safely.

When he tracked her down and begged her return, the same pattern started all over again. So she called the police a second time & the police again made sure she was able to leave the house safely without being attacked and they took her to a women’s shelter where she was able to restart her life again. The shelter also helped her get orders of court protection which was something she was unable to afford the first time. It is always best if you have multiple people or friends who can help you leave safely. Never try to leave on your own or make threats of leaving. Just quietly get friends or authorities to help you. Don’t talk about your plans in the house or car in case it is being recorded or monitored. Don’t warn the violent abuser in advance. Making threats of leaving has gotten a lot of people killed. Say nothing. You need help to leave a violent spouse. More than one person. A group of big male friends, relatives or the police or help from shelters, etc. Many men who abuse women are not so violent when they are facing other men larger than they are or in numbers.

Many of the cases on Forensic Files were set off by these types of threats being used during a spousal argument. 

Remember Drew Peterson and two of his wives? Stacy is still missing. Remember how he followed her everywhere after they were married, checked her phone and her email and made accusations working himself into a suspicious frenzy while he was also planning to replace her with a new mistress? There is a movie about them you should watch.

Remember all the dark secrets of Scott Peterson who pretended to be Mr. Niceguy?

The following items could save your life with an abusive spouse (male or female). Never assume someone is going to be a good spouse. Before marrying someone, ask their former spouses and former girlfriends. Ask female coworkers. Run background checks, read their divorce records, etc.

My former neighbor’s ideas for personal rules dealing with an abuser.

  • If you engage in arguing, yelling, etc., it only escalates the situation and makes the abuser more aggressive and possibly dangerous. 
  • Don’t engage in arguments.
  • Don’t respond to or acknowledge nasty comments, insults, lies, etc. 
  • Never yell
  • Be pleasant and polite
  • Never give them a reason to be violent
  • Never say anything more than twice.
  • Don’t say anything that you will regret.
    • Some things are unforgivable and cannot be undone or unsaid.
  • Don’t resort to name calling or personal criticisms
    • no matter how much you are provoked.
  • Find a way to get out of the situation & away from  the abuser without setting them off
  • Don’t engage in violence
  • Keep friends & family around as much as possible
  • Have a family member live with you or stay over for a while
  • Avoid being alone or alone with abuser
  • Invite frequent guests to come over (close friends who know the situation)
  • Never engage in arguments or name calling
  • Don’t make accusations or demands
  • Never tell an abuser you are leaving
  • Never threaten an abuser
  • Never threaten to divorce or leave an abuser
  • Never threaten to take children or property or money from an abuser
  • Never give an abuser advanced warning about any intentions or actions
  • Wait until you have help from police, friends or family to escort you to leave
    • Help needs to be males big enough & more than one male friend or relative or police officers to protect you from violence when you are leaving
    • a group of females is not enough to protect against an abusive male
  • Or quietly obtain a court order & have the police escort the abuser out the door
  • Never be alone while in the process of a court battle.
    • Stay with someone else.
  • Never become an easy target
    • Change your behavior patterns
    • Drive different routes
    • Change your child’s school
    • Change your child’s daycare
    • Move to another location with a friend or relative
  • Never be alone with the abuser after separating or divorcing.
    • Always have a chaperone & in a public place or your lawyers office
    • Ask a lawyer for advice
  • Carpool to and from work
  • Always make sure someone knows your exact schedule every day
    • where you go and with whom
  • Keep a digital recorder inside the lining of your purse
    • let someone trustworthy know where the recorder is located; just in case
  • Leave copies of evidence, recordings, photos of bruises and written descriptions of abuse situation with a trusted friend or relative
    • Signed & dated

Remember OJ Simpson and his ex wife Nicole.

Most deadly assaults have occurred after a spouse has made threats to leave, divorce, take children, property, money, etc., from the abuser. Never say anything to let an abusive spouse know what you are planning. Get help in advance. Do not make arrangements over the phone, in the house or car where you may be recorded or monitored, nor in front of a child that can repeat what you say. Nor tell anyone who might tell the abuser. Get help to escort you to leave or get court ordered help to remove the abuser. In the meantime, don’t do anything to escalate the situation. Don’t argue or yell or make threats, etc. Try not to respond. I know there are those abusive spouses who will intimidate, yell and threaten but if you respond, it will only get worse. Use your energy to start planning on what you need to do to get out of your situation.

The more the abuser escalates, the more desperate they are to see you come to harm. There could be pressures from a mistress, from a job, from money they owe which they need your demise to fix. They can get buy life insurance policies without your knowledge. They can also get life insurance policies on you through their employer benefits. Watch forensic files and similar shows to give you an idea of just how much danger you could be in.

However, do not strip down the abuser of all properties and unreasonable monies. The abuser needs to have money to live on, car to drive and part of the property in the house so they can have personal items (except weapons. Try to get a court agreement to have the weapons sold and the money returned to the owning spouse or divided rather than returning the weapons).

If you strip down an abuser with a mean lawyer and judge to get even, you are giving the abusive spouse a motive to destroy you and leaving them with nothing to lose for coming after you and harming or killing you. You will do better if you leave them with reasonable money and belongings and a fair part of the house items. It will reduce the amount of rage they have against you. Get a job to help with your own costs. Show you are making an effort to be fair. Utility companies have excellent entry level opportunities, excellent pay and excellent opportunities for advancement and promotions.

Even though I owned and paid for all of my properties and household items, I gave my ex enough furniture and dishware, pots and pans, tables, bed, linens, vehicles, tools, photos, etc., for him to set up a decent home. I did not ask for any alimony or money from him. We divided the savings. It was a mutually agreeable property division. We also remained plutonic friends for a few years then went our separate ways. He was not a violent spouse but he was quite cruel which ended with the divorce.

Some men will marry women with money or pretty women as a trophy prize. But most men will come to resent a wife who makes more money or who has a higher position. Men who marry pretty trophy wives will often become jealous and possessive or they may become abusive if the wife gains weight or gets older. In one case, I saw a story about a man on TV who married his wife because he had an obsession for very overweight women. As his 600 lb wife began losing weight and got below 300lbs, he became increasingly abusive and hateful and began tormenting her with food, etc. I hope she has the sense to leave him. I have seen men deliberately bringing home fatty junk foods to keep their wives fat. It was another form of abuse. They thought it was amusing to have that kind of power over their wives.

I have also seen women abusing their husbands. Abuse is not always the male. Sometimes it is both.  I had another neighbor who is constantly putting down her husband and yelling and making threats. I tried my best to get her to stop. She is not open to reason. She always started the fights and he became abusive in return and drinks heavily. He actually set her up into assaulting him and recorded her. He had her arrested and now she has a police record and was put on probation. He very nearly had her committed to an asylum. I just barely was able to help her avoid that. He was using that ploy to get out of paying her alimony or giving her any of the property by having her declared mentally incompetent.

They finally discovered they could not afford to get a divorce this late in life. Both in their late 50’s and their house is not worth enough for either to afford to get another home nor afford the cost of rents. It is cheaper for them to remain where they are. She still starts fights, but she finally got a job where she works late. and has been working there for 8 years. Having that job also helps her prove she is not mentally unstable should he  try that ploy again. He is an alcoholic who keeps losing his jobs. She often stays with relatives to keep out of his way. In this manner, they have learned to live without battering each other.  I still hear them yell and he is a gun nut who shoots off his guns from time to time which worries me. If she had any sense, she would stop yelling and stop starting fights. She is always the instigator and always putting him down. She seems to think it makes him look bad to others. It has the opposite effect. It makes her look loud, belligerent and unreasonable. He only fights after she starts them, but I fear she is in danger with his drinking and guns. One of these days she will push him too far and pay for it with her life. 

I have also seen many women who think it is perfectly ok to criticize and put down their husband in front of other people. It is quite awful either way. No spouse should treat the other with disrespect. Certainly without abuse or violence. Being married does not give anyone a right to abuse their partner. Verbal abuse and physical assault as well as restricting someone’s freedom of movement is just as illegal for a married couple as it is for a perfect stranger. Just blocking a doorway is considered illegal imprisonment.

Anyone who is cruel or hateful or abusive, violent, etc., either does not want to be married or have kids or they have no respect for their spouse and may have someone else on the side. You cannot fix someone who feels like that. You can only get out of the situation before it becomes worse.

Never let down your guard, especially when a spouse suddenly decides to be nice and want a second chance. They already showed you how they feel about you with the abuse. They only get nice if they have ulterior motives and to gain access to getting you alone or because they found out how expensive it was to be separated and only want reconciliation due to financial reasons. Many of them have darker, more deadly intentions. Pay attention to these forensic file shows and what happens to those trusting abused spouses who went on a reconciliation honeymoon, etc.

These are just various events and stories I can share from myself, friends or family members in the hope the info may be useful. It is not wise to remain in an abusive situation. They almost always escalate and become worse, possibly deadly. No one should ever remain in harms way.


suicidal tendencies in abusive situations

I have a friend who had self destructive tendencies for years and I thought it might be of interest to know how she was cured of this desire. Her main problem was completely devoting herself to someone else so profoundly that she placed their needs above her own. When that person or spouse cheated on her or was cruel to her, her entire world was shattered and she felt it was the end of the world, so she tried to harm herself. She had two spouses which treated her horribly and she was so emotionally hurt by them that she tried to harm herself. Fortunately, she was not successful… but she came close a couple times.

The most horrible part was how her spouses treated her when she was in the hospital. They wouldn’t even come to see her. The first spouse tried to clean out the house while she was in the hospital. She even had to have someone else bring her clothes to wear and give her a ride home from the hospital because her spouse would not. It was his attitude and cruelty and constantly putting her down and trying to destroy her self esteem & confidence which had driven her to such self destructive actions in the first place. She cared too much about the cruel things her spouse said to her. The additional problem is that friends and family begin to turn against someone who repeatedly tries to harm themselves. Friends and family cut themselves off and don’t want to be involved… which makes the situation worse when this person needs  their compassion or help. Tough love does not work for someone who feels self destructive as it does for an alcoholic or substance abuser. Turning away from someone self destructive could result in their death. They need compassion but they also need to learn why they feel like this and how to stop it and how not to use it to get attention. However, these episodes should always be taken seriously because if you treat it as trivial, they could very likely show you how serious they are and it will be too late. If you don’t want to help, then find one of their friends or other family member or a help line who will help them. It is a desperate cry for help and requires understanding what has made them feel this way.

There are some men who will get into a relationship with someone who has money or property just to get even for their first spouse taking away everything they had in a divorce. So they think it is ok to do the same to some other unsuspecting woman out of spite to get even with all women. Hence the brutality. These men are carrying a dangerously vengeful hatred of women seeking payback for the divorce. Judge’s should consider the type of monsters which are created by stripping down someone of all their monies, properties & possessions. It leaves them with rage, motive, vendetta & nothing else to lose. They often go after the first  female they see with properties & money. In my friend’s situation, the property was hers. She earned and paid for all of it herself. It was not the spoils of a divorce.

Her second spouse cleaned out her bank accounts while she was in the hospital. All the money was hers. He never worked a day in his life. Part of the money was from her new employer to help them move to her new job location. She supported her spouse, a former high school sweetheart who had looked her up 20 years later. One day, he decided he wanted the moving money so he took off with half the money without any warning. She came home from work, found him gone and a horrible note he left her. She then hit bottom in a moment of grief and tried to harm herself. While she was in the hospital for 3 days, he stole the other half of her money. She had no idea he had stolen any money until all her checks started bouncing. So you can see how much he cared about his wife. He was also hiding a drug habit she knew nothing about. She was quite naïve. I had tried to get her to run a background check on him but she was too trusting. There is a lot more to the story as to how she was driven to such a low point, but not necessary for how she improved.

While she was in the hospital for 3 days, a psychometrist at the hospital had asked her to describe what her reasons were for trying to harm herself. She told him she wanted her spouse and others who had mistreated her to feel as bad as she did & to regret how they had mistreat her. She basically wanted him to feel bad and regret what he had done and to stop her own pain he had caused. But she was too trusting to understand that some people have no conscience about hurting someone or that they were pretending to have feelings to lure her into marriage and were then abusing her to the point of suicide to get their hands on her money and property. Especially hard for her to believe about a former high school boyfriend she truly cared for.

Then the psychometrist asked her if it worked. Did her spouse feel bad when she ended up in the hospital? She thought about it for a moment and said, “No.” She told me it was like a light switch had suddenly been turned on and she could see clearly for the very first time. She had tried to harm herself because she wanted her spouses, friends and family who had been cruel to feel bad for the way they had mistreated her. Instead of feeling bad for her near death, her spouses had taken the opportunity to rob her blind. They were actually glad she was out of the way. She had given them just what they wanted. It was only the fact that she survived which stopped them from taking everything she owned. She decided that she was never going to give anyone that pleasure again.

Since that day, she says she has never had the desire to harm herself again.

This completely changed her way of thinking. This was 20 years ago and she has never had the desire to harm herself again. She is a completely different person. She used to have a low self esteem. Was always apologizing and feeling like she was being scrutinized by others. She previously had a submissive apologetic mannerism & uncertainty which invited abusers to mistreat & bully her. 

After that moment of understanding, she became confident, sure of herself and a sense of pride which changed the way people treated her. She also stopped getting married and lives alone quite happily where no one is abusive to her. She cut off contact with anyone who was cruel to her… including family members. Just because someone is a relative, does not give them the right to mistreat someone.  She felt no one had the right to be cruel or abusive to her and was no longer going to waste her life on anyone who treated her with disrespect. She has become very strong and independent.  The difference is astounding. You would not know it was the same person. Just that one sentence the psychometrist asked about whether anyone had felt bad about her attempts, made all the difference. She became a new person overnight.

She keeps the TV on for company and she works on various hobbies and projects to keep her busy. She also has pets to keep her company. She is very peaceful now. Before, she used to allow others to be abusive and cruel and destroy her self esteem. But now, when someone treats her like that, she recognizes them for the cruel abusers they truly are and she immediately cuts them out of her life and has no more contact with them. It has made her a strong, happy person who enjoys life. She is determined that nothing or no one will ever again drive her to the point of self destruction. She says she no longer has any such desires and has not had any such thoughts for 20 years.

She finally realized that someone who truly loves you would not try to hurt you. Someone who loves you would try to do things to make you happy and care about your needs. Not just their own. So if someone treats you badly, they are not worth wasting your breath on. That type of person wants to see harm come to you and will continue to try to drive you to the point of self destruction to get you out of their way. Never give anyone that type of satisfaction or power over you. Get away from that person as fast as possible. They are not worth your life. Surviving is the way to get back at someone trying to harm you. They don’t want to see you well and happy. That is the best thing you can do for yourself. Bullies want to see you weak and cowering. The more a victim cowers, the meaner and more vicious a bully, abuser or tormenter will become.  They don’t have a conscience or remorse.

She said it was when the psychometrist had asked her if anyone had felt badly after she had tried to harm herself that she suddenly realized she was doing exactly what her abusive spouse wanted. To get rid of her so her spouse could steal her money and property and even gain life insurance if the policy was at least a couple years old. Her abusive spouses would have gained everything by using cruelty to drive her to self destruction. Her properties were quite valuable because she had a high paying career. Then she was carrying a huge life insurance policy through her employer which was worth millions. We told her she was making a target out of herself. After the last ordeal where her spouse stole the money, she got rid of the huge life insurance account which was worth $6 million. Her second spouse, whom learned about her problems with the first spouse, actually tried to heckle her into killing herself because he knew what had occurred with her first spouse and thought it would work for him as well. It very nearly did. Her 2 spouses thought they could torment her into harming herself so they would gain ownership of her properties.

Once she understood their true reasons for abusing her and deliberately trying to get her to harm herself, she said, “Never again!” and she never did. She also never carried an insurance policy like that again. She has never allowed anyone to destroy her self esteem again for 20 years… and she asked me to include her story on my webpage in case it might help someone else.

Having a background of trying to commit suicide also makes you a perfect target for a spouse to get rid of you so they can steal your money and property and claim it was a suicide by either driving the spouse to harming themselves or making it look like a suicide. Be very careful of what a cruel spouses intentions may be. Also be careful what personal info you reveal to a spouse. Never give them info they can use to harm you. Very few police investigators will take a serious look at a deceased spouse if you have a history of harming yourself. The prosecution would have a tough time convincing a jury. Plus, your own family would testify to your history. A good reason to be very careful who you trust. I did know one lady whom this happened to just a few years ago. Despite the fact that she had a new boyfriend of very low character and a lot of her jewelry and valuables were gone from the house and the method was not something she would have chosen;  the police refused to investigate because of her prior history.

Staying alive and staying away from creeps like that is the best thing you can do. Never let anyone torment you into harming yourself. Do not give them the satisfaction.

If you still feel like harming yourself, please contact someone who might be able to help you. Give yourself a couple weeks to think it over. There may be other alternatives you have not considered. Perhaps a fresh start in a new location would help you get away from your troubles. If you have children, you certainly don’t want to leave that bad memory for them or people you care about.

Lack of sleep and lack of proper foods can throw off your chemical balance and cause extreme depression as can substance abuse. It can affect your judgment, making things seem worse than they are.  Things always look better after a couple days of sleep and proper foods. Never do anything drastic when you are upset. You don’t have anything to lose by waiting a few days to think things over after you have gotten some sleep and food. Talk to someone else who cares or someone completely new or  hotlines to help you if you don’t have anyone else to talk with. They wouldn’t be volunteering unless they care about people. Perhaps a church or a social group?  Sometimes just talking can help you find better options. Please don’t make any rash decisions while you are upset.

Think about what my friend said. Never let anyone make you feel bad about yourself. Anyone who abuses you or says unkind things does not truly care for you, so they are not worthy of you. Don’t place your self worth and welfare in the hands of someone who is cruel and abusive. Don’t give them what they want. Nothing will bother the abuser more than seeing you happy, smiling and self confident.  Staying alive and being happy is the best way to get back at an abuser who tries to hurt you.

If you have a situation similar to my friends who had abusive spouses driving them to suicidal thoughts… never let anyone break down your self esteem or drive you to self destruction. Find someone to talk to or someone to help you. There is a lot of qualified help available if you need it. Never do something destructive while you are upset. Being upset alters your brain chemicals and can obscure your ability to make sensible decisions. Go somewhere safe & secure. Get some sleep and some food and wait a week or two to rethink your options. Call someone to talk with or seek qualified services or perhaps medical care which may have medicines to help. Or perhaps you are already taking medicines which are causing false depressions.

Never do permanent harm to yourself. Seek out help from friends, family, help lines or medical professionals. They will likely have alternative ideas or ways to help your situation which you may not have considered. Never give some cruel person the benefit of getting you out of their way. They won’t feel bad. They will take everything they can get their hands on.

Your happiness, survival and self confidence will be the last thing a cruel abuser wants to see. Get away from someone like that and start fresh, but do so safely. You can lead a happy life without being mistreated or abused.

I hope that some of this info may help someone else.


Diabetes type 2

I’m going to share a few tips I learned. I know I was tired of having to look at 20 sites for basic info and never finding what info I needed. So, I’ve tried to compile some basic info below in the hope it helps centralize efforts.  Always seek advice from a qualified, competent medical professional for any health related issues. I’m not a doctor. I can only describe what issues apply to me, my family or friends.

The most important pieces of info to remember: A 30 minute walk each day will help your body to produce required insulin levels. Vinegar on any food will break down sugars. Belly fat impairs your body’s ability to produce insulin. Sugar in your blood is like crushed glass and will destroy your kidneys, organs, blood vessels and damages blood cells causing blood clots, loss of hands or feet, loss of kidneys, blindness, amputations.  Don’t eat any white foods or starches. (white bread, potatoes, sugar, white rice, etc.), never eat any kind of corn, your brain requires some carbohydrates to function. To my best knowledge, blood glucose should be between 75-100. 70 is too low and you can die from going without any glucose.

I believe the #1 cause of diabetes is Corn and corn products such as corn syrup, corn starch, corn oil, etc. in nearly everything you eat or drink. This doesn’t mean there are not other triggers to cause diabetes but Corn is certainly one of them. Start reading the ingredients on everything you eat. If it says corn, don’t eat or drink it. Cook from scratch instead of processed foods so you know exactly what is in it. The ethnic groups and countries with the highest levels of diabetes also have the highest levels of Corn in their diets such as Native American and Mexico and US. The lowest levels are Asian countries such as Japan and China. I would also recommend avoiding soy and yeast as well for other reasons. Take a look at the following list and you will see how the ethnic groups with the highest corn levels also have the highest diabetes levels.
Bad foods;
Avoid white breads, potatoes, sugars, white rice, corn, corn syrup, corn starch (any kind of corn), sweets, desserts, pasta, animal fats, fatty beef, greasy fatty meats, snacks, chips, fast foods, soda pop, no fried foods, processed foods, milk fat (drink skim), cheese, canned fruits, jellies, ketchup (Catsup), mayonnaise, syrup, (I recommend avoiding soy for other reasons), cakes (any white flour breads), alcoholic drinks, etc.
Good foods;
Vinegar will help break down the sugar when added to any foods.
Change to Wheat bread, wheat pasta, wheat products, truvia, skim milk, plain cheerios cereal, lean meats, seafood, (cooking by steam, boiling, microwave or baking. No frying!) baked turkey, baked chicken (no poultry skin), olive oil, salads (Vinegar & olive oil dressing), brown or wild rice, vegetables, cook from scratch, skim milk, yoghurt, vinegar, mustard, eggs, Amy’s brand soups, cook veggies from scratch, veggie stews, steamed cabbage, cabbage stews, white summer squash instead of potatoes, etc.
Here is an article about food for diabetics and foods to lower your glucose levels to avoid getting diabetes.


The symptoms I had for high blood glucose was headaches, fatigue, chronic thirst, frequent urination and blurry vision (could also be Sjogrens). Other symptoms listed are tingling and numbness in hands and feet (could also be Raynauds), slow healing injuries and bruises (could also be lack of vitamin C).

Not one of my eye doctors ever suggested I should check my glucose levels when I complained of blurry vision. I had to buy my own test meter to check myself. Unfortunately, I did not know when to test or what I should be looking for. If your blood sugar levels are above 150 two hours following a meal, your insulin is not adequately taking care of your needs. Start checking your blood 2 hours after every meal and report these findings to your doctor who can advise any treatments you may need.

Here is an article on Diabetes symptoms.


Glucose monitoring:

It is critical to have CLEAN hands and a CLEAN test area on your skin before testing your blood. The monitors are so sensitive to blood glucose that any contaminants can artificially elevate the glucose readings on your monitor. For example, I was eating some grapes while on my computer and watching TV. I managed to transfer some of the grape juices to my keyboard, mouse and TV controller.

Days later, even though my hands were clean, I picked up the remote after I washed my hands and it transferred grape glucose from days earlier, to my fingers. I was getting three wildly different readings on the same test area. 249, 365, 289 all within 30 seconds due to the contamination. If I had taken the insulin based on any of those readings, it would have dropped my glucose to fatal levels. My true reading was 149. Fortunately, I recognized those higher readings were not normal for me. I thought I had bad test strips. I asked the pharmacist, a nurse I knew who has a son with juvenile diabetes and none of them had heard of 3 different readings like this in a row. I even tried double checking between different fingers and different hands. This went on for over a week or two before I finally figured out  what was wrong. Just because you do not see or feel sugar on your keyboard or remote, etc., it doesn’t mean you are not getting cross contamination.

Lotions may also alter your glucose readings as may some soaps. An alcohol wipe may not remove the sugar contaminants from your finger but it will help if you use it every time.

This is why it is CRITICAL to ensure you have CLEAN hands and you should also clean your remotes, keyboards, mouse, phone, keys, door knobs, refrigerator handles, toilet and faucet handles, writing implements, light switches, cup handles, wallet, and your glucose monitor and test apparatus to remove any possible transferred contaminants you might have inadvertently contaminated from something you ate or drank. It will also help avoid bacteria. Especially when you eat while watching TV or your computer, phone, etc., or in your car. It doesn’t take much. A grape, a sandwich, your beverage, a handle or knob or phone someone else handled, etc. You can even cross contaminate just touching your own face or scratching your neck, etc.

It only takes one mistake injecting too much insulin to kill you. So make sure your glucose tests are accurate by having clean hands and avoiding cross contamination. It would be a good idea to keep something sweet available in your home, car, pockets or purse for emergency in case your blood sugar drops too low.

So when you clean your hands, do your glucose test before you touch anything else and make sure your test apparatus is also clean. I use the alcohol swabs to clean the apparatus but I also make sure it is safe to use alcohol on it first before using alcohol on anything. Alcohol can damage some products.

When testing your fingers, use the outer edge of the corners of your finger rather than the top center. Just go outward from the center which is less painful. You can adjust the depth of the lancet to the least necessary to obtain blood. Although the type of monitor I use can also use blood from your forearm, if you take betablocker blood pressure medicine, it can severely impair the circulation in your arms and legs. Even at the full puncture depth, all I could get on my forearms was a hole with no blood after years of taking betablockers. I made changes to my medicines after that but then it caused arrhythmias which required another alteration of medicines again.

There are also different ways of testing your glucose levels depending on your doctor and your type of diabetes and your particular problems. I can only tell you about the way I do it as an example. My doctor has me test my glucose 2 hours after a meal and to use 1 unit of fast acting insulin for every 50 points above 150. So, if my glucose is at least 150, then I use one unit of novolog fast acting insulin. If it is 200 then I use 2 units. 250 would be 3 units, etc.

Some doctors have their patients test their blood before eating and estimate how much glucose will be produced by their meal and thus they take the insulin before they eat. There are also different types of insulin and how fast they drop your glucose levels.

The doctors probably wont like my comment on this and perhaps there is a reason why this advanced insulin calculation method prior to a meal might be preferable for some patients, but quite frankly, I think this method is crazy & dangerous. If the patient does not accurately calculate how much glucose they are planning to eat or the amount of insulin they need, there is extreme danger of taking too much insulin and going into insulin shock and dying from glucose levels going too low. Just using vinegar in your meal can significantly lower the glucose produced and cause the insulin calculations to erroneously drop the blood glucose levels too low. Even in the hospital, the nurses test the blood and inject the insulin before you eat your meal despite the fact that they have no idea how much or which items I plan to eat.

I was told that blood glucose levels should not drop below 70. 

In my case, 1 unit of fast acting insulin drops my glucose levels by 50 points. So it would be very dangerous to make a mistake on how much insulin you need in advance, based on how much glucose you are planning to eat. One mistake could be fatal. I much prefer the method of checking the blood glucose levels 2 hours after the meal and taking the correct amount of insulin to reduce the glucose levels. That method also reduces the chances of mistakes.

Because my glucose levels are artificially elevated due to taking cortisone (prednisone), I rarely need more than one unit. Without cortisone, my glucose levels are normal, below 100 and often just 78. But I have adrenal insufficiency and fibromyalgia and crohn’s which all require cortisone, otherwise I suffer horrific pains. I’ve been on cortisone for over 5 years. Anytime I don’t take the cortisone I need, I go into adrenal cortisol crisis which is fatal. So I can only try to keep my cortisone levels as low as possible.

I use a freestyle Freedom lite glucose monitor which is very sensitive to the smallest amount of blood and can be used elsewhere than just the fingers. No one told me how to use the strips so I was doing it wrong. I was trying to wipe the blood on the strip.

The test strips have a tiny point on each side of the strip. Touch the point to the blood and it will soak up the blood and the unit will beep. Also, Keep a spare battery for the monitor on hand in case you need it.

The doctor should also monitor your A1 levels as well as CBC, CMP, plus your kidney, pancreas and liver panels on your blood tests.


Insulin and diabetes medicines:

I have covered most of these issues in my article on “Insulin” on this same page. There are different types of insulin and they all seem to contain phenol or m-cresol or metacresol which are other names for phenol which is a toxin used as a preservative which I do not believe should be injected into your body. Phenol is the main ingredient in Lysol. It is also used in some topicals but I don’t believe it should be injected or ingested. It is also tied to liver damage and death in cats. That should tell you something about phenol.

The reason I had chosen insulin is because of the constant TV ads from Lawyers regarding dozens of different diabetes drugs to control blood sugar or insulin levels causing pancreatic cancers. Dozens of these drugs over the past 20 years have been associated with these deadly cancers. It seems the only way to survive is to lower our blood glucose levels by controlling our diets. Read my Insulin article on this same page and the following link to an article about insulin associated cancers and heart attacks.


If you have a Novolog pen injection system (it may also apply to other brands), you should ALWAYS REMOVE THE NEEDLE TIP AFTER EVERY USE. If you do not remove the needle tip, even one time, it will continue to seep and leak the insulin fluid. I made this mistake just one time. I had capped the needle and thought I removed it, but only the cap came off and I did not notice the needle was still attached. Over 50 units leaked from the pen which I did not notice. I did notice the cap was wet with a strong phenol smell. However, the plunger had sank with the loss of the 50 units but the screw inside which controls the units dispensed, did not adjust with the loss of the leaked insulin. It was separated from the plunger. So when I was dialing the pen to dispense 1 or 2 units of insulin, I was not getting anything in the injection and did not notice it until my glucose levels were shockingly high even after a second injection the next time I ate. I then saw the screw inside was not touching the plunger. I dialed a couple units and pressed the button to inject while in the air and it produced nothing. I realized I had not been getting any insulin with the shots. I had to keep dialing and pressing the button with the needle in the air (NOT in me) until the screw finally came into contact with the plunger and was once again producing insulin. Over 50 units had been lost. I am very careful about removing the needle tip each time, but just one miss was enough. I did not have my glasses on and did not notice the needle tip did not come off with the cap. So it seeped 50 units. I was lucky I noticed I was not getting the insulin and was able to fix the screw separation. This is a caution to let you know you cannot forget to remove the needle tip even one time. It is why it is imperative to see a tiny drip of insulin appear on the needle point before you dial to inject. That tells you the screw is in contact with the plunger. You can also see the screw through the glass viewing windows on the side of the pen. Read the instructions. Ask your pharmacist, doctor or the manufacturer if your pen is not working correctly or if the screw is not in contact with the plunger or not appropriately producing a drip on the tip as described in the instructions.

I place the used needles, lancets & strips in empty prescription bottles to ensure no one gets accidentally injured by the used items. These also have safety caps on them as well.

Even though some insulins may say it can tolerate room temperature, always keep the insulin refrigerated. Do not take any chances.



Cortisones can artificially increase blood sugar levels. No one told me this. So I’m sharing what I’ve learned so others don’t have to learn the hard way as I did. I’ve been on cortisones for 5 years. In my case, I only recently learned the prednisone I take for Fibromyalgia, Crohn’s & adrenal insufficiency has raised my blood sugar levels enough to require insulin the last 5 months. In trying to lower those blood sugar levels by reducing my cortisone, it causes a cortisol adrenal crisis withdrawal due to adrenal insufficiency which is fatal. I finally got it low enough to only need insulin once every few days but caused an adrenal crisis  & had to increase the prednisone again.

I chose insulin because the pills to control glucose or insulin levels always seem to cause Pancreatic Cancer. Then I learned Insulin contains phenol & has a high incidence of cancer & heart attacks within 3.3 years of use, which is why I was endeavoring to lower my prednisone to lower my need for insulin. Read my article on Insulin on this page for more info and the article on the link below.


Organ damage:

Sugar in the blood acts like crushed glass in your body & destroys organs like kidneys, damages blood cells causing clots & impairs circulation & peripheral nerves  leading to organ failure & Amputations. When the doctors kept telling me my triglycerides were too high, I didn’t understand the danger because I had normal glucose and normal cholesterol levels at the time. Not one of my doctors told me the sugar was acting like crushed glass. I knew cholesterol and plaque was like that but I did not know about sugar being like that. So I am making sure you know about this as well.

Having seen a damaged kidney versus a healthy one and a diabetic with Amputations it made me realize the seriousness of controlled sugar levels. I think Halloween candy and trick or treating should be eliminated. Just have costume parties. Also, soda pop is a primary source of damage due to the corn syrup or sugars. Just remember, it is like eating or drinking crushed glass whenever you eat candy or drink soda pop. What is worse for me is that I am deathly allergic to artificial sweeteners like aspartame and saccharine. I can only tolerate Truvia (Stevia) which needs a tiny amount of sugar to make it taste right.

We need to educate our children when they are young and teach them proper diet. It is important to show them why it is imperative. I wish I had known these things when my child was young. It doesn’t make any impression upon someone unless they know the specific reasons of the bad effects from what they are doing. It is not enough to just say they need to watch their diet or keep glucose levels down. The terms exercise and lose weight have been said so many times that no one hears them anymore. It is not enough. They need to know the consequences from an early age.

There was an Oprah Winfrey episode I saw repeated as a rerun a few months ago where a doctor showed the damage to the kidneys and interviewed a diabetic who lost her legs and arm to diabetes. That show will most certainly leave a lasting effect and scare you into taking these issues seriously. It also let us know that taking a 30 minute walk each day will help your body produce insulin. It also said that belly fat interferes with your body’s ability to produce insulin. Or how vinegar on any food will break down the sugar. I had never heard these specific issues before except on this one show.

Here is an image of kidneys damaged by diabetes.

1 kidneys